Today we had a cool Bio lecture. We were talking about about Apoptosis- the programmed cell death or (a definition by Prof. Gillen)'Use it or lose it!'. It's so fascinating how cell differentiation really determines the 'future' of an organism, how a tiny protein can cause death if it doesn't function properly. I really think apoptosis is very very cool- if it is prevented from dying, it will cause the organism to die.
I got my schedule for next semester already. I got all classes I wanted except the English class. I am planning to meet with the professor and 'beg' to let me in coz I really need to take that class for the sake of MCAT (or DAT)! I am sooooooo looking forward for the Comparative Animal Physiology class ^^ Chem class hopefully will be enjoyable to, or at least interesting. I believe that Chem lab wont be such painstaking, like Bio labb, since it requires neither long report nor minitab (yayyyy ;p). Oh ya, I am taking Calc class next semester and my two other Bio genetics fellows are taking the same class. I really enjoyed having group study with them this semester and I am pretty certain that next semester we'll have even much more 'fun' since we'll be living in the same house.
Lately, I have been writing crappy stuff. lol. Writing really comforts me though I often write rather bias stuff to confuse the readers.hahaha. Some secrets are just exclusively for me and God :) In 9 days I'll be outta OHIO. So looking forward for home.. lots of plans including taking a baking class, (possibly) dancing class, learn how to drive (again), finish my 'novel', do some shadowing job at the hospital (hopefully), AG in Semarang, Surabaya project, etc etc. Too many plans too little time!
Last weekend was much fun. I met lots of new folks at Indonite. I sang there and I thought it went pretty well (though I am not very sure since there was no monitor for the mic thus I could not hear my singing). But at least I enjoyed it. It was nice but 'scary' at the same time to be on the stage again after a long time withdrawing my self from 'intense' singing.
Well, enough writing for today I guess. I still got some other stuff to do including the presentation for my bio experiment and french hw.
je ne sens pas tres mal aujourd'hui. J'espere qu'il fasse beau, pas de pluiiiiii!!!!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Monday, April 28, 2008
Untitled
A rather short poem. Again, written by me, inspired by my heart. I wrote it probably a month ago or so (and this one perhaps doesn't make any sense to others but that's the main point why I wrote it.hehehe)
Today I found it stuck with the other papers, piled near my desk..
Satu
Datang menjamah
Luluh
Senyuman dan air mata
Sayang
Harap hati
Diterpa angin
Jauh
Diterpa angin
Harap hati
Sayang
Air mata dan senyuman
Lelah
Datang menjamah?
Setengah
Today I found it stuck with the other papers, piled near my desk..
Satu
Datang menjamah
Luluh
Senyuman dan air mata
Sayang
Harap hati
Diterpa angin
Jauh
Diterpa angin
Harap hati
Sayang
Air mata dan senyuman
Lelah
Datang menjamah?
Setengah
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Combination
I feel like writing, but I dont know what to write. More aptly, I have to much to write thus I cannot decide which ones I should write.Hehehehe.. (Prob, this isnt worth reading for u)
Hari ini ada piknik satu sekolah. It was fun and the food was slightly better- they had potato salad^^
I should be reading some Bio and doing some french excercises now but I am so tired. Tlaked to my sis yesterday. It was a good heart to heart talk and we spent an hour on the phone.hehehe.. The night before yesterday we spent 2 hrs talking. It was so nice since we havent spoken to e/o for ages. Like I've said before, we are angels sent from The Great Man above to each other :) Miss you, Bot.. Cant wait to do crazy stuff with u di surabaya ntar! Ntar gua hancurin mobil lo!kekekekkeke
Ada satu pepatah yang lumayan terkenal. Saking terkenalnya, pepatah ini suka digunakan org untuk main2 or cuma sekedar bilang. Nanti sekarang gua ngalamin sendiri, baru gua rasa how powerful that saying is. It's like, a combination of sorrow and joy. Tidak perlu dikatakan namun bisa dirasakan. Tidak perlu dijelaskan namun bisa dipahami. Tak perlu direngkuh karena yg tulus itu datangnya dari hati. Gua surely bisa bilang, pepatah itu mmg bener cuma ngga mudah dijalanin.
Kita berdua ngalamin hal yang beda tapi sama. Lucu aja since kita bedua itu best frieds, trus ngerasain hal gini barengan. Hehehe.. Love you Val. Cant wait to see you at our lovely town^^
Oh ya, Indo nite sebentar lagi niy. Rada nervous juga. Seumur2 baru kali ini gua perform trus latihannya cuma sekali, trus cm sama gitarisnya lagi. Aih aih.. Hope it will go well
Mom just called.. Talk about some stuff, about her trip to Aussie with dad. They will be gone right when I arrive at home, tegaaaaaaaaa..hehehe. Ngga lah.. ngga apa2. They desreve to have a break. Trus mom lanjut, crt ttg mau latiha driving lagi. Gua kaget aja tiba2 mama bilang "Njel, ntar di Manado latihan pake mobilanya mama papa aja. Kan automatic juga". Wew, kaget gua. Tu mobil keramat mau dikasih gua pake latihan! waaah.. lumayan tersentuh juga gua.hehehe.. cuma, I dont think they have toldmy bro about this. coz im sure he wont ever let me drive that car, even worse latihan pke tu mobil. Dia cinta ma mobil tuh kayak ma pacar. Padahal dia pny mobil sendiri.. cm yah, gitu lah cowo, susah dimengerti..hehehe. But, well, we'll see..
I am so so so tired now. My eyes, if they could speak, would have shouted at me for abusing them!lol. I am still chatting with some friends. It's 8 minutes past midnight. I give up! Gotta sleep now..
Je suis fou parce que de tu me manque! Hahaha.. Sok dramtis! :D
Ya wes, bobo dulu ah..
Hari ini ada piknik satu sekolah. It was fun and the food was slightly better- they had potato salad^^
I should be reading some Bio and doing some french excercises now but I am so tired. Tlaked to my sis yesterday. It was a good heart to heart talk and we spent an hour on the phone.hehehe.. The night before yesterday we spent 2 hrs talking. It was so nice since we havent spoken to e/o for ages. Like I've said before, we are angels sent from The Great Man above to each other :) Miss you, Bot.. Cant wait to do crazy stuff with u di surabaya ntar! Ntar gua hancurin mobil lo!kekekekkeke
Ada satu pepatah yang lumayan terkenal. Saking terkenalnya, pepatah ini suka digunakan org untuk main2 or cuma sekedar bilang. Nanti sekarang gua ngalamin sendiri, baru gua rasa how powerful that saying is. It's like, a combination of sorrow and joy. Tidak perlu dikatakan namun bisa dirasakan. Tidak perlu dijelaskan namun bisa dipahami. Tak perlu direngkuh karena yg tulus itu datangnya dari hati. Gua surely bisa bilang, pepatah itu mmg bener cuma ngga mudah dijalanin.
Kita berdua ngalamin hal yang beda tapi sama. Lucu aja since kita bedua itu best frieds, trus ngerasain hal gini barengan. Hehehe.. Love you Val. Cant wait to see you at our lovely town^^
Oh ya, Indo nite sebentar lagi niy. Rada nervous juga. Seumur2 baru kali ini gua perform trus latihannya cuma sekali, trus cm sama gitarisnya lagi. Aih aih.. Hope it will go well
Mom just called.. Talk about some stuff, about her trip to Aussie with dad. They will be gone right when I arrive at home, tegaaaaaaaaa..hehehe. Ngga lah.. ngga apa2. They desreve to have a break. Trus mom lanjut, crt ttg mau latiha driving lagi. Gua kaget aja tiba2 mama bilang "Njel, ntar di Manado latihan pake mobilanya mama papa aja. Kan automatic juga". Wew, kaget gua. Tu mobil keramat mau dikasih gua pake latihan! waaah.. lumayan tersentuh juga gua.hehehe.. cuma, I dont think they have toldmy bro about this. coz im sure he wont ever let me drive that car, even worse latihan pke tu mobil. Dia cinta ma mobil tuh kayak ma pacar. Padahal dia pny mobil sendiri.. cm yah, gitu lah cowo, susah dimengerti..hehehe. But, well, we'll see..
I am so so so tired now. My eyes, if they could speak, would have shouted at me for abusing them!lol. I am still chatting with some friends. It's 8 minutes past midnight. I give up! Gotta sleep now..
Je suis fou parce que de tu me manque! Hahaha.. Sok dramtis! :D
Ya wes, bobo dulu ah..
Sunday, April 20, 2008
thank YOU
J'ai figuré hors de la réponse! Je suis heureuse =)
Oh ya, church was good today. The Bible sharing was good and very insprative. Also, had good conversations with the church members. Got to talk a lot to some people that I dont usually get to have conversation with. It was a good meaningful day overall. I thank YOU for that..
Oh ya, church was good today. The Bible sharing was good and very insprative. Also, had good conversations with the church members. Got to talk a lot to some people that I dont usually get to have conversation with. It was a good meaningful day overall. I thank YOU for that..
Saturday, April 19, 2008
I joke. But I am not a joke!
It did not occur to me that different people can take (or respond to) serious issues in extremly different ways.
Someone took something that is, to me, a serious and sensitive thing as a joke. I was sad. Though I didn't seem to be sad. I told someone ('x') about this, but I didn't show to 'x' my sadness. Even to the person that made the joke ('y'), Im sure 'y' doesn't know that 'y' had said something that somehow hurt me.
I do not know if the joke was purely a joke, or 'y' actually ment to say that for any reason that I have no clue about. Whatever the truth is, I am not angry at 'y'. I am sure 'y' didn't mean to be insensitive. It was just something that I won't ever take as a joke. And I was expecting 'y' not to take it as a joke either. But, anyhow, now I know that people do take serious matters in different ways.
Someone took something that is, to me, a serious and sensitive thing as a joke. I was sad. Though I didn't seem to be sad. I told someone ('x') about this, but I didn't show to 'x' my sadness. Even to the person that made the joke ('y'), Im sure 'y' doesn't know that 'y' had said something that somehow hurt me.
I do not know if the joke was purely a joke, or 'y' actually ment to say that for any reason that I have no clue about. Whatever the truth is, I am not angry at 'y'. I am sure 'y' didn't mean to be insensitive. It was just something that I won't ever take as a joke. And I was expecting 'y' not to take it as a joke either. But, anyhow, now I know that people do take serious matters in different ways.
Friday, April 18, 2008
Just a cool randomly found thing
Lagi chatting sama Ko Tries.. Ko Tris kasih gua link to two cool songs. Two of them are my fave songs. But I especially found one of them is a tres brilant!
A song by Alicia Keys.. She is so gifted and her performance is so brilliant in so many level- vokal, improvisasi, penjiwaan, piano, power, etc etc etc all!! Gila keren banget live-nya!!! Check it out! I swear it's a piece of prformance that worth seeing.
Here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3duSgotmyVs&feature=related
and here's the lyric:
If I ain't got you
Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power, yeah
Some people live just to play the game
Some people think that the physical things
Define what's within
And I've been there before
But that life's a bore
So full of the superficial
[Chorus:]
Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, Yeah
Some people search for a fountain
That promises forever young
Some people need three dozen roses
And that's the only way to prove you love them
Hand me the world on a silver platter
And what good would it be
With no one to share
With no one who truly cares for me
[Chorus:]
Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, you, you
Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, yeah
[Outro:]
If I ain't got you with me baby
So nothing in this whole wide world don't mean a thing
If I ain't got you with me baby
A song by Alicia Keys.. She is so gifted and her performance is so brilliant in so many level- vokal, improvisasi, penjiwaan, piano, power, etc etc etc all!! Gila keren banget live-nya!!! Check it out! I swear it's a piece of prformance that worth seeing.
Here's the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3duSgotmyVs&feature=related
and here's the lyric:
If I ain't got you
Some people live for the fortune
Some people live just for the fame
Some people live for the power, yeah
Some people live just to play the game
Some people think that the physical things
Define what's within
And I've been there before
But that life's a bore
So full of the superficial
[Chorus:]
Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, Yeah
Some people search for a fountain
That promises forever young
Some people need three dozen roses
And that's the only way to prove you love them
Hand me the world on a silver platter
And what good would it be
With no one to share
With no one who truly cares for me
[Chorus:]
Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, you, you
Some people want it all
But I don't want nothing at all
If it ain't you baby
If I ain't got you baby
Some people want diamond rings
Some just want everything
But everything means nothing
If I ain't got you, yeah
[Outro:]
If I ain't got you with me baby
So nothing in this whole wide world don't mean a thing
If I ain't got you with me baby
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Random thoughts
Exactly..
3 weeks from now ---> hopefully it will be much fun yet (somehow) productive at the same time
Now I am cramping on scheduling my courses. Majoring in Mol Bio or Bio? One is advantageous for me in number-of-class-I-have-to-take wise since my pre-med courses will already cover many of them. The other one is what I am more interested in but will give me freaking intense Junior n Senior years.
Gotta decide before April the 23rd. Wish me luck!
3 weeks from now ---> hopefully it will be much fun yet (somehow) productive at the same time
Now I am cramping on scheduling my courses. Majoring in Mol Bio or Bio? One is advantageous for me in number-of-class-I-have-to-take wise since my pre-med courses will already cover many of them. The other one is what I am more interested in but will give me freaking intense Junior n Senior years.
Gotta decide before April the 23rd. Wish me luck!
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Tired..
Today I don't have high fever anymore which makes my life works much better. Still have runny nose, cough and the back pain. It's exactly 3 weeks I've been having this back pain now. It's been quite sometimes that makes me feel like, 'oh, whatever..'
Water is my best friend now. I have never drank this much water before in my life. One new record!
Despite of my illness, so many upsetting things happened (or are happening). Classes, lab, my job supervisor (thanks for introducing to me how mean the 'real world' is), things that aren't working as planned, etc etc etc. The hardest thing for me now is to get motivated and to be grateful. I am not complaining or whatsoever but neither do I feel like seeking HIM. I feel, somehow, numb.
The atmosphere in my room is not very supportive either. If I am physically ill (and a bit mentally too), my roomie, let's just call her H, is mentally ill (that may have given her a bit of physical illness too). Both of us have missed classes for two days. Well, I didn't miss all classes. I went to the first class and then gave up- for 2 days in a row. Poor H, she is uber sad and stress and probably depressed too. I understand how hard it is for her for knowing a problem but not being able to fix it- her parents are about to get divorced. She is such a strong person. She just cried once, when she first knew about her parents' 'plan', and I haven't seen her cried ever sice. But I can tell from her eyes that she is hiding all the pain herself, holding back the emotions and tears so others wont see. She hasnt gone to school and has been watching and sleeping a lot.
I know I really should be grateful. At least, the pain I have now is a physical one, which I am pretty sure will get better (well, hopefully soon) as long as I treat it right (plus prayer too!). I can't imagine if my parents got divorced. I might have gone insane, do crazy things and, even more dangerous, loose my faith (oh GOD forbid!!). I need to learn to be grateful in ANY KIND of situation, dont I?
At this point of my life, to be honest, I just want to seek comfort from my parents. I am phisically and mentally used up..
Water is my best friend now. I have never drank this much water before in my life. One new record!
Despite of my illness, so many upsetting things happened (or are happening). Classes, lab, my job supervisor (thanks for introducing to me how mean the 'real world' is), things that aren't working as planned, etc etc etc. The hardest thing for me now is to get motivated and to be grateful. I am not complaining or whatsoever but neither do I feel like seeking HIM. I feel, somehow, numb.
The atmosphere in my room is not very supportive either. If I am physically ill (and a bit mentally too), my roomie, let's just call her H, is mentally ill (that may have given her a bit of physical illness too). Both of us have missed classes for two days. Well, I didn't miss all classes. I went to the first class and then gave up- for 2 days in a row. Poor H, she is uber sad and stress and probably depressed too. I understand how hard it is for her for knowing a problem but not being able to fix it- her parents are about to get divorced. She is such a strong person. She just cried once, when she first knew about her parents' 'plan', and I haven't seen her cried ever sice. But I can tell from her eyes that she is hiding all the pain herself, holding back the emotions and tears so others wont see. She hasnt gone to school and has been watching and sleeping a lot.
I know I really should be grateful. At least, the pain I have now is a physical one, which I am pretty sure will get better (well, hopefully soon) as long as I treat it right (plus prayer too!). I can't imagine if my parents got divorced. I might have gone insane, do crazy things and, even more dangerous, loose my faith (oh GOD forbid!!). I need to learn to be grateful in ANY KIND of situation, dont I?
At this point of my life, to be honest, I just want to seek comfort from my parents. I am phisically and mentally used up..
Monday, April 7, 2008
Gallons of water!!!!!
It's about the back pain (again)..
After being convinced by Mary Clare to go to medical center, I decided to go. I am glad that she convinced me to see the doctor and my stubbornness was not high reaching the sky (like my appetite).
I had to wait for about an hour or so to see the doctor. But reading People was kinda relaxing (was it really??). Lots of crap boring gossips- Britney Spears, Jolie-Pitt, Hannah Montana, etc. Oh ya, I read a story about a pregnant man. was disgusted when I saw the picture of that man with his pumped belly. But then I figured out that he was originally a woman- a very pretty one. The summary- She got her breasts taken away by surgery, got some male hormones and changed her outter apperance. Yet she (now she is a he) still has the reproduction organ and thus she can get pregnant. He is married to a woman whom womb is not functional anymore (cant remember why).
Then the doctor came. I explained to her what I have been feeling and she did some check on me. I got my urin sampled and she left me for a little while. It took her about 15mins to get back to me again. Guess what..
I have kidney stones!
That explains why I got that very painful attack on my right back waist. Now I know why I always feel tired even when I get 7-8 hours of sleep 7 days in a row. Thank God my kidney stones are not that severe. Now I am taking some medications and have to go to the medical center in 2 weeks to get my urine sampled again.
I still do not know why I have been craving for sweets so much. Neither I know why my appetite is sooooo up high. I just eat and eat and eat. All these weird symptoms came along with the first back pain attack. I am not functioning properly.
I really should have some rest before I go to french evening class. Hopefully this fever will vanish soon
Oh ya, and I need to drink gallons of water!!!
After being convinced by Mary Clare to go to medical center, I decided to go. I am glad that she convinced me to see the doctor and my stubbornness was not high reaching the sky (like my appetite).
I had to wait for about an hour or so to see the doctor. But reading People was kinda relaxing (was it really??). Lots of crap boring gossips- Britney Spears, Jolie-Pitt, Hannah Montana, etc. Oh ya, I read a story about a pregnant man. was disgusted when I saw the picture of that man with his pumped belly. But then I figured out that he was originally a woman- a very pretty one. The summary- She got her breasts taken away by surgery, got some male hormones and changed her outter apperance. Yet she (now she is a he) still has the reproduction organ and thus she can get pregnant. He is married to a woman whom womb is not functional anymore (cant remember why).
Then the doctor came. I explained to her what I have been feeling and she did some check on me. I got my urin sampled and she left me for a little while. It took her about 15mins to get back to me again. Guess what..
I have kidney stones!
That explains why I got that very painful attack on my right back waist. Now I know why I always feel tired even when I get 7-8 hours of sleep 7 days in a row. Thank God my kidney stones are not that severe. Now I am taking some medications and have to go to the medical center in 2 weeks to get my urine sampled again.
I still do not know why I have been craving for sweets so much. Neither I know why my appetite is sooooo up high. I just eat and eat and eat. All these weird symptoms came along with the first back pain attack. I am not functioning properly.
I really should have some rest before I go to french evening class. Hopefully this fever will vanish soon
Oh ya, and I need to drink gallons of water!!!
Sunday, April 6, 2008
1:25pm
4 more weeks to go..
Missing my family so much.. Still missing him but it's under control now. I won't fight this feeling no more. This sincere love I have is a gift from God that I should be grateful of. Though the situation I'm facing now is not the best one, I am learning how to embrace it rather than bewailing about it. The focus now is not him but the 'good shaped' loving heart God wants me to posses. I believe that he is just a media God uses to train me to be a better person. Otherwise, HE wouldn't introduce him to my life and let this feelings grew at the first place. Now I can be honest to myself about how I feel. In this situation, I have overcome my emotion and pertinacious. Which, to me, is indeed a remarkable accomplishment!
As the wise men say, "The process of learning is hard. But you will be amazed when you see how it shapes you into a wiser and stronger person!"
Instead of feeling like a fool and pity myself, God enables me to observe this situation with different perspective- a great opportunity to grow up as a better person and, moreover, a better Christian! :)
Missing my family so much.. Still missing him but it's under control now. I won't fight this feeling no more. This sincere love I have is a gift from God that I should be grateful of. Though the situation I'm facing now is not the best one, I am learning how to embrace it rather than bewailing about it. The focus now is not him but the 'good shaped' loving heart God wants me to posses. I believe that he is just a media God uses to train me to be a better person. Otherwise, HE wouldn't introduce him to my life and let this feelings grew at the first place. Now I can be honest to myself about how I feel. In this situation, I have overcome my emotion and pertinacious. Which, to me, is indeed a remarkable accomplishment!
As the wise men say, "The process of learning is hard. But you will be amazed when you see how it shapes you into a wiser and stronger person!"
Instead of feeling like a fool and pity myself, God enables me to observe this situation with different perspective- a great opportunity to grow up as a better person and, moreover, a better Christian! :)
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Banana Bread
Ugggghhh.. I am so bloateeeddd! My tummy hurts! But I shouldn't be complaining since I made myself suffer- I ate way and way too much!!
Wait, before I continue, I gotta ask Sasha if we actually have AT class today..
I am back. Sasha wasn't in her room.
Oh yeah!!! I just checked my email and my French prof said that we wont have AT class tonight because the AT is sick (I am sorry that she's sick)! Good for us! :)
Okie, back to the main topic. I have been eating way too much lately. My appetite is up high reaching the sky! Also, they have been serving banana bread very often (not putting the blame on the kitchen staff!!)! I am so much in love with banana bread! I have been eating it all the time! It's insane coz I just cant stop eating them. Even when I was too full to have a bite more, I'd go for even another piece! Gosh.. This is neither good an nor healthy (well, at least it tastes good! :D). Raluca said that she's making banana bread soon and she'll keep some for me! yummmmm.. I asked her if I could possibly get the recepie and she promised that she'll email it to me! How great!
My backpain is not as bad now. Slow but sure I can feel that I am recovering. Though I still cannot put my trousers on if I dont sit down. Lame. I know.. Also, it still hurts when I sneeze. I really should go to the medical center but I know I wont ever do that. Lame. I know.. Tomorrow I'll go to KAC to work out. I need to stay healthy for the sake of semester exams. Oh ya, have been having 7hr of sleep everyday this week! This one is not lame, clearly! I am impressed!
Tonight I dun have much work to do. Thus, I am planning to do a bit of 'Why Pray?' reading and also wanna watch the movie I borrowed from Ko Bud. I have listened to the one of the soundtracks and I liked it. So I am pretty excited to watch the movie (hoping that they have some good songs that I can add to my fave song list).
Now I am following the flow. The flow of God's river of love and mercy. HE always reminds me to take 'them' bit by bit, not all at once. HE ensures me that I am not alone. HE will walk hand on hand with me and go through all this. I know that I am not standing on a 'high enough' spot to see the 'big puzzle'. But God does stand high enough to see it from above. There are small pieces of puzzle. Some are 'Joy', some are 'Tough Time', some are 'Happy', some are 'Lonely', some are 'Upset', some are 'Laugh' some are 'Confused', some are 'Love', some are 'Tears', some are 'Smiley Face'... They all belong to a puzzle frame called 'Process of Maturing'. My pieces are scattered in my ocean of life, wave of emotions, and God is fondly gathering all those.
I am learning how to reduce the number of 'Why' or 'How' and increase the number of 'What'- not "Why this happened to me, Lord?" or "How could YOU let this happened to me, Lord?", instead wisely ask "What do YOU want me to learn from this and what do YOU want me to do, oh Lord?". Up to now, what I can get is God wants me to learn how to love unconditionally and to take lessons from hard situations with a grateful heart.
Upsss.. gotta go to work now! Library is calling! Now I am up to "How can I help you today?" with a friendly smile! :)
Wait, before I continue, I gotta ask Sasha if we actually have AT class today..
I am back. Sasha wasn't in her room.
Oh yeah!!! I just checked my email and my French prof said that we wont have AT class tonight because the AT is sick (I am sorry that she's sick)! Good for us! :)
Okie, back to the main topic. I have been eating way too much lately. My appetite is up high reaching the sky! Also, they have been serving banana bread very often (not putting the blame on the kitchen staff!!)! I am so much in love with banana bread! I have been eating it all the time! It's insane coz I just cant stop eating them. Even when I was too full to have a bite more, I'd go for even another piece! Gosh.. This is neither good an nor healthy (well, at least it tastes good! :D). Raluca said that she's making banana bread soon and she'll keep some for me! yummmmm.. I asked her if I could possibly get the recepie and she promised that she'll email it to me! How great!
My backpain is not as bad now. Slow but sure I can feel that I am recovering. Though I still cannot put my trousers on if I dont sit down. Lame. I know.. Also, it still hurts when I sneeze. I really should go to the medical center but I know I wont ever do that. Lame. I know.. Tomorrow I'll go to KAC to work out. I need to stay healthy for the sake of semester exams. Oh ya, have been having 7hr of sleep everyday this week! This one is not lame, clearly! I am impressed!
Tonight I dun have much work to do. Thus, I am planning to do a bit of 'Why Pray?' reading and also wanna watch the movie I borrowed from Ko Bud. I have listened to the one of the soundtracks and I liked it. So I am pretty excited to watch the movie (hoping that they have some good songs that I can add to my fave song list).
Now I am following the flow. The flow of God's river of love and mercy. HE always reminds me to take 'them' bit by bit, not all at once. HE ensures me that I am not alone. HE will walk hand on hand with me and go through all this. I know that I am not standing on a 'high enough' spot to see the 'big puzzle'. But God does stand high enough to see it from above. There are small pieces of puzzle. Some are 'Joy', some are 'Tough Time', some are 'Happy', some are 'Lonely', some are 'Upset', some are 'Laugh' some are 'Confused', some are 'Love', some are 'Tears', some are 'Smiley Face'... They all belong to a puzzle frame called 'Process of Maturing'. My pieces are scattered in my ocean of life, wave of emotions, and God is fondly gathering all those.
I am learning how to reduce the number of 'Why' or 'How' and increase the number of 'What'- not "Why this happened to me, Lord?" or "How could YOU let this happened to me, Lord?", instead wisely ask "What do YOU want me to learn from this and what do YOU want me to do, oh Lord?". Up to now, what I can get is God wants me to learn how to love unconditionally and to take lessons from hard situations with a grateful heart.
Upsss.. gotta go to work now! Library is calling! Now I am up to "How can I help you today?" with a friendly smile! :)
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