When I was younger I always said (or convinced my self and, possibly, others) that "I will get whatever I want if I fight for it!"
Things were more predictable when you are less aged, I indeed second this motion! Goals were easier to achieve as long as one dares to put as much effort as possible, even better if supported with perfectionism. That's what I used to be and to think, I'd say. But that's not quite true though. Sometimes, some failures are just unavoidable regradless the amount of sacrifice one put. And the lessons from those failure aren't always crystal clear. In fact, most of them are just naturally long-term lessons that come with pains. It's neither the easiness of goals nor the works I put that makes things seem to be more under control in the past and not so much now. The older you are, the more knowledge you gain (any type of knowledge!). Suprisingly yet ironically, the more knowledge I gain leads me to the realization on how less knowledgeable I am!
As one's age increases, one's thoughts expand. The more people I meet, broader activities I am engaged in, increased tasks yet less resting time, more complex conversations, greater freedom and responsibilities. All those aspects I am dealing now, that I did not face when I was younger, teach me that "necessary" is not quite the same as "sufficient". Age will lead people to see their goals as a big puzzle frame, instead of stressing so much on each puzzle piece. To start seeing success as a life journey and not a final destination is like a watershed moment from leaving the "naive perfectionist" and becoming a "realistic high-aimer". I guess, in my early 20s, I am still far away from being a mature, wise and emotionally stable woman. As my age progresses, I am hoping that, from the school of life, I will be able to learn to distingusih which of my needs/ interests are necessary and which are sufficient.
Let's put those thoughts aside and talk about the main thing I actually wanted to talk about in this post (as always, it takes at least one paragaph to be straight forwardly writting about the main messages). These nine research papers I am reading now- they take forever! I need to deal with them in order to come up with a good research proposal and thus get the summer science research I have been wanting for! While reading, I was wondering- do I really want to do this?. I try to connect this one educational goal of mine to my thought about the "necessary and sufficinet" issue, and , as a result, this bothering thought came to my mind: Am I doing this for the sake of passion or for the goodness of passion's half-sister aka ambition?. If it's passion that foregrounds my goal, how big is it? Is it big enoguh that, if I get the summer scinece, it will bring as much enjoyment as knowledge to me? What about if it is actually ambition, purely ambition? People often say that ambition usually prevents someone from knowing her/ his true passion of life. Is that bad then? My summer project might suck then, right?! Or, say it is a combination of both passion and ambition.. Do I have each of them equally? If I have more of ambition than passion or vice versa, what are the pros and cons?
*does it mean: the older you are, the more paranoid you become?
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Tips for Better Life
**Sentences in "bold" shows my agreement, in "italic" indicates comments
1. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk, smile.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3. Sleep for 7 hours.
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Play more games. such as??
6. Read more books than you did the previous year.(besides school textbooks, I believe)
7. Make time to practice meditation, yoga, and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink plenty of water.
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.okay, i'll try!
13. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
14. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
15. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment. trying really hard to do so!!!!
16. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
17. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
18. Smile and laugh more.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
22. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
23. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about. Don't compare your partner with others.
24. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
25. Forgive everyone for everything.
26. What other people think of you is none of your business.
27. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
28. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
29. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
30. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
31. The best is yet to come.
32. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
33. Do the right thing!
34. Call your family often.
35. Your inner most is always happy. So be happy.
36. Each day give something good to others.
37. Don't over do. Keep your limits.
38. Share this with someone you care about (Click the "Share" link below)
For more on wonderful happiness ideas, please join the group "The Happiest Day of Your Life"
http://groups.to/happiness
1. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day. And while you walk, smile.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3. Sleep for 7 hours.
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Play more games. such as??
6. Read more books than you did the previous year.(besides school textbooks, I believe)
7. Make time to practice meditation, yoga, and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink plenty of water.
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.okay, i'll try!
13. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
14. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
15. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment. trying really hard to do so!!!!
16. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
17. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
18. Smile and laugh more.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
22. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
23. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about. Don't compare your partner with others.
24. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
25. Forgive everyone for everything.
26. What other people think of you is none of your business.
27. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
28. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
29. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
30. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
31. The best is yet to come.
32. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
33. Do the right thing!
34. Call your family often.
35. Your inner most is always happy. So be happy.
36. Each day give something good to others.
37. Don't over do. Keep your limits.
38. Share this with someone you care about (Click the "Share" link below)
For more on wonderful happiness ideas, please join the group "The Happiest Day of Your Life"
http://groups.to/happiness
Sunday, January 4, 2009
2009
It is insane how fast time goes by! All those memories from my winter break last year are still in my mind, crystal clear, and now my 2008 winter break is already going towards its end.
Yesterday, we had CG at Ko Tries' place. Each of us got to share something about what we experienced in 2008. I said, for me, 2008 was an interesting year. There were many excitements that I embraced and, at the same time, took lessons of. There were many downs as well, but surely I found a better angle of seeing my relationship with God through those tough times.
Dec 2008, it is my third time spending Christmas without my family. If on those old days I used to feel bored, if not complain, about our family's Christmas rituals, now I kind of miss them. Visiting my grandparents and the older and relatives (this one is what me and my siblings hesitate the most.lol), open house-ing (aka eating from plate to plate until you feel like vomiting to see food!),get very tired when we reach home, wake up late the next day and eat out for a family lunch or, if we are too lazy, mom will cook something, then we'll have lunch in our pajamas..
I forgot that I was homesick until then.
Was talking over the phone with mommy couple of days ago and I was surprised that they're going to have an open house! That is going to be the first open house ever since we moved to Manado! Usually, we would only visit other families, the older ones. But this time we are having one! Ahhh.. to bad I had to miss it!
About my bro's plan to get married sometimes this year, I am so excited! :) God, I pray that You lead my bro so he'll marry the one that is best from You. Amen.
My little bro is now in the choir and prayer ministries of the youth. I was enlightened to know such joyful news. I have always been praying that God will draw him close to Him and I want to thank You for your care to my beloved little bro!
My biggest gratitude oh Lord, is the second chance you gave me. That thing that I did really was non right and I knew it did not please your heart. I promise to use the opportunity you gave to its most! I realize that one of the ways to be grateful of Your blessings is that by using them to the most and be blessings to others. And I realized that I had been lacking of doing that in 2008. For such lame attitude of mine, taking Your care and blessings for granted, I want to truly apologize.
It was hard for me to come up with a new year resolution. I felt like I had to make too many resolutions and to pick just one/ some of them is just as hard as to eat raisins. I could not decide. Yet God helped me to choose and prioritize what ought to be prioritized! For sure, the connection between the Bible reading in CG and at church was not only an accident. I knew God wanted to tell me what resolution I should have through the Bible sharing shared by Ko Tries and Pastor Yo. He longs for neither money nor talent, He just want my heart. God-centered, that is what my 2009 resolution should be. And it is more than just believing in Him. It's rather a trust, trusting in His plans in my life. I know it's hard, I know, as human, I tend to plan what my life should be in the future. But if truth to be told to myself, I have come this far with all the great chances I have had in my life, they were never in my plan! Not even a single one! They were all God's works that are upheld by His mercy and care. So, how could I now not counting on Him? Why should I not FULLY trust in him? Really, I do not have enough reason to take over the steer!
I think what I need to do is just to close my eyes and start to see Him with my heart. And that's my resolution for 2009!
Yesterday, we had CG at Ko Tries' place. Each of us got to share something about what we experienced in 2008. I said, for me, 2008 was an interesting year. There were many excitements that I embraced and, at the same time, took lessons of. There were many downs as well, but surely I found a better angle of seeing my relationship with God through those tough times.
Dec 2008, it is my third time spending Christmas without my family. If on those old days I used to feel bored, if not complain, about our family's Christmas rituals, now I kind of miss them. Visiting my grandparents and the older and relatives (this one is what me and my siblings hesitate the most.lol), open house-ing (aka eating from plate to plate until you feel like vomiting to see food!),get very tired when we reach home, wake up late the next day and eat out for a family lunch or, if we are too lazy, mom will cook something, then we'll have lunch in our pajamas..
I forgot that I was homesick until then.
Was talking over the phone with mommy couple of days ago and I was surprised that they're going to have an open house! That is going to be the first open house ever since we moved to Manado! Usually, we would only visit other families, the older ones. But this time we are having one! Ahhh.. to bad I had to miss it!
About my bro's plan to get married sometimes this year, I am so excited! :) God, I pray that You lead my bro so he'll marry the one that is best from You. Amen.
My little bro is now in the choir and prayer ministries of the youth. I was enlightened to know such joyful news. I have always been praying that God will draw him close to Him and I want to thank You for your care to my beloved little bro!
My biggest gratitude oh Lord, is the second chance you gave me. That thing that I did really was non right and I knew it did not please your heart. I promise to use the opportunity you gave to its most! I realize that one of the ways to be grateful of Your blessings is that by using them to the most and be blessings to others. And I realized that I had been lacking of doing that in 2008. For such lame attitude of mine, taking Your care and blessings for granted, I want to truly apologize.
It was hard for me to come up with a new year resolution. I felt like I had to make too many resolutions and to pick just one/ some of them is just as hard as to eat raisins. I could not decide. Yet God helped me to choose and prioritize what ought to be prioritized! For sure, the connection between the Bible reading in CG and at church was not only an accident. I knew God wanted to tell me what resolution I should have through the Bible sharing shared by Ko Tries and Pastor Yo. He longs for neither money nor talent, He just want my heart. God-centered, that is what my 2009 resolution should be. And it is more than just believing in Him. It's rather a trust, trusting in His plans in my life. I know it's hard, I know, as human, I tend to plan what my life should be in the future. But if truth to be told to myself, I have come this far with all the great chances I have had in my life, they were never in my plan! Not even a single one! They were all God's works that are upheld by His mercy and care. So, how could I now not counting on Him? Why should I not FULLY trust in him? Really, I do not have enough reason to take over the steer!
I think what I need to do is just to close my eyes and start to see Him with my heart. And that's my resolution for 2009!
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