unspoken words

I was randomly screening my books I brought from the States this morning. I love good books and I found books a great hiding place. I miss the moment when I can just burry my nose behind my books and none will dare to say a thing--- coz that's just a typical day at Kenyon. You cannot be too nerdy or to wild of a party rocker. It's a beautiful place where knowledge grows deep inside. When one can learn about life, love, and friendship while being educationally enriched and challenged.

My Kenyon Hill often insipred me to write. I found couple poems I worte a while ago. I found writing very soothing. When my heart is restless and words can't be spoken, I can always run to my pen and paper :) I love writing. Moreover, I love the memory that I can recall from reading my writings in the years after. Here goes just a few of the poems I wrote with a glimpse of story behind them..

this was the transition stage.. from "a broken heart" to "embracing a new love story". I was in disguise and don't want to completely move. Was welcoming one, yet cannot let go the other one. Ahhhhh love is really a game of the fools

Gejolak itu datang lagi
Menambah yang pernah ada
Membuat hati bergetar lagi
Namun kubetranya..

Adakah nyata semua harap
Ataukah cuma aku yang terpesona?
Jiwa ini lelah dengan asa yang sekejap
Karena mendamba bagiku itu segenap jiwa

Dia yang tak mungkin kurengkuh, tak kuasa kulepas
Walau tak bersama, memori indah tetap terjaga
Selesai sudah, selesai sudah ku berkemas
Sudah siap aku, utuh cintaku, tuk berlabuh di sana

Adakah yang di sana itu nyata?
21 feb 2009


then I felt down again.. realizing that it wasnt easy for my broken heart to pretend to be jolly =(

Disini aku kembali lagi
Dengan asa yang masih terukuir terpatri
Salju jatuh perlahan, menyentuh bumi
Aku dengan sejuta perasaan, menanti yang tak pasti

Pohon yang sama, ranting yang sama
Tegar berdiri lewati ragamnya musim
Akankah bertahan hasrat di dada
Terluka mendamba cinta yang tak mungkin?
Feb 2009



the new one comes like a wind-- comes and go as he wished. Maybe that is not the best way to describe him. But I still remember the way he made me struggle with those up and down feelings. Yet slowly for sure, he was taking my world over.. turning my gloomy winter days into spring afternoons-- with lots of flower, yet still some rain.


Mengapa kau datang mengetuk
Kalau jadinya tak pernah mau masuk
Sesaat terasa seolah kau menanti
Terkadang terpikir bahwa kau tak peduli

Banyak Tanya berhimpitan di dada
Hatimu padaku ataukah padanya?
Walau sering kau tunjukkan perhatian dan sayang
Tetap saja ragu mengikuti sukma, bagai bayang

Mencinta bagiku itu segenap jiwa
Jangan biarkan hatiku harap bila itu tak nyata
Bila kau memang sang pujangga
Mengapa sulit bagimu tuk merangkai kata?



Misunderstanding. This stage was the most difficult one duirng our "PDKT" time. hehe.. I thought he was making me an option, and vice versa. So, it was kinda "HTS" yet already being so jealous with each other. Bitter sweet indeed ^__^


Belahan jiwa kemanakah kamu?
Kemarin ada sekarang dimana, ku tak tahu
Bagai langit nakal, kemarin cerah hari ini kelabu
Kau sembunyi hatimu, biarkan gelisah hatiku

Tak lelahkah kau melompat kesana kemari?
Tak letih kah kau menari dari hati ke hati?